A Real Life Fairy Tale

I did not think I really cared about the royal wedding of William and Kate... I thought I was just interested in her dress...

But this morning, when I turned on the TV to see the dress, and instead I saw the horsemen, the horse drawn carriage, the prince in his uniform, and an amazingly beautiful bride.... I said to Leah "Look! A real life Princess!" and  I knew it was a moment I wouldn't forget.

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I realized that this is all just the perfect fairy tale.   A part of history, and tradition, and exactly what you imagine a real life Disney princess wedding would be like.   

It just makes me happy.  Simple as that. 

BRILLIANT!

Tonight, while reading the book "On the Farm", without being promted, Leah:

• Quacked like a duck while looking at the pictures of ducklings.
• "Moo"ed at the Cow.
• And sniffed the air when the line "He sniffs with his snout." was read.

GENIUS I tell you!!

I know this might be very normal for a 17 month old... but Brian and I were about the proudest parents ever!!

I LOVE watching her grow!

It might just be my new favorite holiday

I LOVED Easter with Leah!

She is finally at an age that is fun with holidays!   She absolutely loved hunting for eggs, especially after she realized there was candy inside!  

At my parents, my mom hid the eggs 3 times.

The Easter Bunny hid eggs for her once.

And at Brian's parent's the eggs were hidden twice.

I honestly am not sure if she had more fun finding the eggs, or living off of jelly beans and peeps.

The Monday after Easter, the first thing she did when she woke up was look for her eggs and check for any candy.  Smart kid.

Checking out what the Easter Bunny left... a Little People School Bus!

She might have found a ball during her hunt... and never put it down.   My child is obsessed with balls.

LOVE HER!

Me: "Brian you look buff in this picture!"

Brian: "what are you talking about? I am buff!"

Holidays are so much more fun when you get to experience them thru a child's eyes!   I cant wait till the next one!

Aftermath Anxiety

While laying in bed, reviewing notecards, and just acting a little off all afternoon:

Brian:  Starting to freak out?
Me: nods yes.
Brian: I guess I wont ever understand it. I never had test anxiety.
Me: Its not exam, its aftermath anxiety.

And I think that is EXACTLY it. 

I am ready to take the test. I want to take the test. I LOVE taking tests.

My worry comes from the "What if I fail?... I have to tell everyone I failed. I have to look at this stupid material AGAIN. I have to be 6 months behind on my career goals AGAIN. That's 6 more months that I get to spend less time with my family...feeling like this!" 

Its 2 and a half weeks till D-Day.

I think I am handling this exam better than I have in the past.... I feel like I am on the brink of a meltdown, but I feel like I am controlling it better this time around. I know to ask Brian for help on all other things. I know that if I just study a little more, I will feel better....I plan to call up a cleaning service to come do our house for me so that its one less thing to worry about.

This time around, I feel like I have things more under control.

Lets hope it helps!

X< 3 weeks to go

My apologies for my posts being so few and far between....

My exam is now 2 weeks and 6 days away and I am in butt kicking mode!

I have my action plan.

I know what I still need to learn.

What I still need to memorize.

And I have 20 days to do it!

I would really like to never ever see this material again!!

For real this time!

So BRB...

One Seven

The baby that Leah used to be seems to be disappearing and the little girl she will become is starting to shine.  

At 17 months old Leah is becoming a little chatty cathy.  The list of words that have escaped her mouth gets longer by the day.   Throw in singing, trying to catch the cats, cleaning the house for me with the towels she pulled out of the kitchen drawers, patting the bed next to her to show me her desire to cuddle with her mommy, trying to pick up a spider she finds outside, tasting the plants, helping daddy push the lawn mower, grabbing her diaper and running to her room when she needs to be changed, grabbing her shoes and coat so she can go outside, helping to buckle herself in her car seat and  knowing her shapes so that she can successfully play with her toys and make her parents think she is the smartest kid around… she is definitely growing up.

I even saw a glimpse of the teen she will become yesterday.   In an attempting to teach Leah the best way to sled down the backyard hill (yes, in April and 75 degree weather! Leah thought it was the greatest thing ever! Mommy and Daddy had a lot of fun as well!) She got upset and stormed off; not wanting any help.  I had flashbacks of being with my dad, working on my pitching, jump shot, or punts, getting an attitude, and storming off…. She is my child. It was exactly like what I remember doing growing up.

This weekend even marked her first time out… We stuck her in her crib and closed the door for a minute after she pinched Brian for getting upset.  The crib was the only place we could put her where she wouldn’t run away… I am thinking about a time out chair… what do you think? Or other disciplinary suggestions? At first I said “You’re in time out for 2 minutes because we do not pinch.”  But then quickly changed it to 1 minute as I walked out of the room… Aren’t you supposed to do whatever their age is?

I know we are about to enter a whole new world… disciplining, potty training, and learning boundaries… Oh my!

On your marks, Get ready,GO!

Enjoying the Great Outdoors

Leah would happily live outside if she could.

As soon as we get home in the evenings and I open up the door to pull her out of the car she seems to realize "IM OUTSIDE!" and refuses to head in the house for atleast an hour.

On the weekends, we are outside by 8 am.

We basically come inside only to sleep, whether its a nap or bed... Even food seems to make its way outside to be consumed.

Today, as Brian and I sat in the lawn chairs, watching Leah run around the garage, I looked at him and said "I guess this will be our typical weekend for the next 4-5 months huh?"  ...which sounds pretty wonderful to me...

I might actually get some color this year!!

Happiness

This weekend has been absolutely wonderful.

Girl time at the winery.

Lots of sunshine.

QUALITY family time.

Breakfast out, playing outside, BBQing dinner, and then sitting around the kitchen table together.  

And it was the last weekend of tax season!! Starting next week we get 2 whole days to spend as a family and life can  almost get completely back to normal!

I hope next weekend is even better!

Conquering Math Camp

Last week I went to Chicago for work, attending Math Camp (aka a seminar that consists of 8 hrs a day of straight math!)

I feel a bit more prepared for my exam, which is only 4 weeks and 6 days away. OMG. I feel motivated to keep studying and get this stuff down so that I can kiss this Financial Economics good bye forever!!!

Leading up to my trip, I was so excited to go.

I thought for sure I would love the time away.

Time to sleep. Time to  read. Time to relax. Time to study. Time to refresh. Time for Kim.

And yes, I am averaged 9.5 hours straight of sleep, and getting to do all of those other things, but I was completely heart broken by how much I missed my family!!

I tried not to call or check in too much because it only made me miss them worse .Talking to Brian on the phone and hearing Leah chatting away, telling me "Hi"... it became depressing!

I think Ill take my busy, sleep deprived life any day over being away from my favorite people.

What is an Actuary?

Most of you will find this pretty boring.... but funny to me...

This makes me feel much better regarding my inability to do mental math and the fact that I go crazy around exam time!

I am just a pretty normal actuary.... not crazy!

Immediate Family

I haven't written in a while.

I have known what I wanted to write about, but every time I had the tried, I just did not want to open up.

I knew it would make me cry.

My Aunt Diana passed away.

2 deaths within 4 months is hard.

2 deaths of people who held very special places in my heart.

The service was beautiful.The weather was perfect. The number of people who's lives were touched by my Aunt was amazing.

It is heart breaking to see such an amazing, wonderful, loving person leave us.

I missed a day of work.

When I returned I asked my manager how I was supposed to record my bereavement.   He asked the administrative assistant to check on it.

She replied "Bereavement is only for immediate family.   An Aunt does not qualify.   PTO needs to be used."

I was heart broken again.

Diana was my only Aunt in town.

We spent holidays together.

She watched me the night my mom "planned" on having my little sister.

We spent summers together hanging out in the pool.

I borrowed books from her.

I loved her cheddar broccoli rice.

I admired her Christmas tree and hundreds of ornaments.

She watched me grow up, playing sports.

She was at my college graduation.

She was the one who could get Leah to burp when she was 6 weeks old and I had yet to discover gas drops.

She took care of my grandmother after she had her stroke, and was taking care of her things since she had passed away.

She was one of the most kind, amazing, strong, and dedicated women I know.

To me, she is my immediate family.

And I hope she knows I loved her that much.





*** My amazing boss used his "managers discretion" and allowed me to use bereavement days.