Thursday, April 29, 2010


She is totally making the sound!! ... I think its her way of showing how much she misses her daddy!!  I am not sure when we can classify "Dada" as her first word... I guess when she says it to him and knows she is saying it!?

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


Lately I have been reminiscing about when Brian and I first met.... Maybe its the fact that we are coming up on the 5 year anniversary or a friend of mine was just talking about how in love she is with her new guy or Brian is out of town way too much lately and I just miss him like crazy (crazy as in I end up crying everytime I talk to him on the phone) or then there is that Darius Ruckers song "History in the Making"....

It was the summer after my Sophomore year of college. I was finally allowed to move out of the dorms and I had just signed a lease to live in Cape Place apartments from Aug-Aug. I was dreaming of the following summer in Cape, 21, and not at home with my parents. I had a friend named Jeff who is/was probably the most outgoing person you have ever met... and most people have met him! ha. Everytime we saw eachother he would ask "Where are you girl friends?" and I would always reply with "Where are your guy friends?". He would then go on to tell me how he had one friend who he knew would be perfect for me...

One day I get a call from Jeff... "I am hanging out with that guy I told you about, lets hang out so you guys can meet." I had spent the entire day with Kate and we already had a few invites for that evening... a part at my roommates house in Union, or a get together with some highschool friends... I somehow talked Kate into going to dinner (Red Robin, my favorite!) with these 2 guys she didnt know. We figured that if we got bored, we could make an excuse and leave.

We met them at Jeffs apartment... we walked in the door and Brian was sitting on the couch. I remember thinking to myself "Hes cute! He looks perfect!" I think the only thing we really said to eachother was "Hi"... Within 5 minutes the 4 of us got in Brian's car and headed to dinner. After "knowing" Brian for 5 minutes, while sitting in the back of his car heading to dinner I remember thinking to myself "Well.. it looks like I wont be staying in Cape next summer after all.. I will have to come back home to be with him!" Who does that? Maybe it was the crazy girl coming out in me, or maybe I just knew....

When we sat down for dinner, Brian and Jeff ordered beers while Kate and I, both 20, ordered sodas. Brian caught on immediately and asked how old we were... he was shocked that we werent 21... it was like we were kids to him and I felt like I had lost hope... but we started talking... about how he was an accountant and so was my dad, and his dad... how we both lived in Fenton but he moved... but we both were Rockwood babies... and then we both went to SEMO.

Kate must has seen how interested I was in Brian and being a good friend said we could continue to hang out with them... we went back to Jeffs apartment to hang out. We played card games, talked, laughed, went for a midnight swim, and just fell in love.

We exchanged numbers and me being the typical girl and already head over heels, called the next evening... he didnt answer... and didnt call back.... I was pretty devistated.

A few days later though in the middle of the day, while I was doing my usual summer gig of babysitting 4 kids (Yep, everyday for 4 summers!) I got a phone call from Brian! I remember getting the worst butterflies in my stomach ever and just being SOOOO giddy! We decided to see eachother again...

Our first "date" was a.... interesting one.... nothing romantic.... but perfect all the same... it was exactly how our life today is.... He invited me over to his apartment, where he would BBQ dinner and we would play some tennis. I do not remember the order of events... but I remember we did alot that night... somehow we played tennis, went and walked around the mall (I have NO IDEA why!) attempted to watch the movie Coach Carter but we ended up taking the ENTIRE time and he made me dinner... luckily I was thoughtful and brought over a side of pasta salad... the kraft kind... because he planned on just feeding me chicken. .... To this day he still BBQs me dinner while I make the pasta salad at his request... and we just spend time around the house, nothing exciting... but perfect and just to our liking.

After a month of dating I knew I loved him, but didnt say anything for another 4 months where he said it as well... and around that same time I remember my girlfriends saying "You guys are going to get married!" and I remember thinking to myself "You are totally right! He is the one I am going to marry!" ....

And here we are... married for almost 2 years with the most amazing little girl ever and excited about what the next 70 years will bring! :)

I love you Brian!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Lets make it 2!

Sophie has yet to be found, and after my father n law failed to also find her (remember he is the one that found my keys, phone, and camera when I lost them in my own home) I ordered another... Hopefully she will be here by the end of the week because....

Leah's SECOND tooth is coming in! Yup, the other bottom middle one. Yesterday I noticed her gums being SUPER swollen and today my father n law and daycare mentioned how she had another one coming in... sure enough, tonight, she gave me a big smile and I saw the little line on gums right next to her tiny tooth. Thats 2 teeth in a week!! She is getting so big!

Alright... its been a LONG day... I would love to write more but I am exhausted! Brian is out of town again!... all week and next week too... I am trying to study for my test that is in 17 days! ... and Im just beat...

Good night!

Thursday, April 22, 2010



Last seen: Sunday evening 04/18/10, our family room
Height: 5 inches
Reward: Baby Smiles

In all seriousness... Sophie is missing!! I have checked the couches... I have checked the car... I have checked Leah's room.... And of course she is missing when she could be used for her intended purpose... TEETHING! We all very sad that we cannot find her!! I will give it a week maybe... and then Im ordering another one!!

Monday, April 19, 2010

adding to the list

After MONTHS of drooling like a mad lady, Leah's first tooth decided to make an appearance last night!

Its one of her bottom middle teeth.... its nothing to see really see yet, but you can definitely feel it... and Leah has been a bit of a bear.... that is until the Tylenol kicks in!

Hopefully in the next few days I can get a picture of the little bugger!!

Growing up seems to be in overdrive right now!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Ta Da!

I swear Leah turns a month older and its like she wakes up as a new baby! She suddenly pulls out all of these new tricks!

  • She can now be put in bed, half asleep, and fall asleep on her own... unswaddled... just turn on her seahorse and she will take care of the rest!
  • She tries to reach for EVERYTHING! We took her out to lunch and she wanted to grab everything in sight.
  • She has found her feet, but only while sitting in her bumbo. She even got a toe in the mouth!
  • She is starting to smack everything. She realized that she can now control her arms, but they still need a little practice!
  • She can wear super cute things like this!!

  • She now tries to dive out of her bumbo! Good bye counter top sitting!

  • And then she did THIS!!!!! It only lasted about 5 seconds.... but she did it! I am sure in the next few weeks we will have ourself an independent sitter!

Friday, April 16, 2010

A Daddy Day!

Brian was off today.... Happy end of tax season!

...and he was sweet/brave enough to spend it with Leah!!

I called once and he let me know how she had napped for an hour and 45 minutes, and he was currently washing bottles!

I LOVED hearing this!!!

I cant wait to go home and have him tell me all about their day together!!!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Night # 3

First off... Happy end of tax season!!! I get to spend full weekends with Brian again and he will be home in time to even pick up Leah a few nights a week so I can get some study time, we can eat dinners together again, and Brian can even start BBQing us dinner since he will be home before the sun goes down!! I am so excited!!!

Last night was.....Ok.

8:00 - passed out. I managed to keep her up until Brian got home but she was TIRED! Pretty much as soon as he walked in the door I handed her over, he held her for a few minutes and put her in bed.

12:30 - No 11:30 wake up... it was pushed back an hour... maybe we will slowly get it to 6 am? ha.

2:30 - Managed to skip the bottle again...

4:00 - woke up, first I just gave her her binkie and she went right back to sleep. I didnt even pick her up... but of course 5 minutes after I layed back down she started crying again... I got her up, rocked for a few minutes, put her back down... again 5 minutes after I laid down she was crying... 3rd time going in her room, I gave her the bottle. I just had to show it to her and she was reaching for it. (so cute by the way! She is starting to really reach for things!!) She drank it and was back down.

5:40 - she decided she wanted to get up....I got her up and dressed... and she laid in bed with Brian and I for some family cuddle time... and played for a bit... but by 6:20ish she was tired again and I put her back down until Brian left with her for daycare around 7:00. I knew she was up too early... but oh well.

It was interesting though bc when I put her back down this morning she wasnt falling asleep in my arms, but I knew she was TIRED! ... so I just laid her in her crib. And she actually went back to sleep on her own after a few seconds of rubbing her back and then walking out of her room!! Yeah!! This is a step forward!

I am actually excited for this weekend and to see how she naps! I am hoping I can get her to take a few good naps in her crib!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Night # 2

Like I said, last night wasnt so bad.... we might have even done something that will help in the long run to get her back to sleeping thru the night!

The night went a little something like this:

6:00 - Bottle.

7:15 - Leah is falling asleep on me while we lay on the couch and watch American Idol.... so I figure I need to put her in her bed.... she sleeps for about 5 minutes and the next time I check on her she is just laying in her crib contently, looking at her seahorse. Awesome! She never just lays in her bed quietly unless her mobile or something is going on!

8:00 - she starts fussing, so I pick her up and rock her for a few minutes and she really goes to sleep.

11:30 - she wakes up... I think its the new 1130 thing... ugg... but I get her quickly back to sleep. I went back to sleep....

2:00 - I wake up to her fussing... I feel like I had just laid down... when I look at the clock, my sleepiness sees 12:00... not 2:00... so I go in her room thinking "ugg! you were just up, why are you up again?" She takes a little bit longer to get back to sleep, but she goes back to sleep after about 5 minutes of rocking. I get back to my room and see what time it really was! I then feel horrible that I didnt give her a bottle.. and she hasnt eaten anything in 8 hours! ... but she is asleep... I cant wake her up to feed her... I figure she will probably be up again within the next hour for that bottle...

5:00 - I wake up on my own to check the clock and see that its almost time for me to wake up, but she is still sleeping, and she still has not eaten in 11 hours! I decided to get her up and feed her and put her back down then, just so that she doesnt get up between 530 and 6 when I am supposed to be getting dressed and ready for the day since Brian is not home to help with her in the morning. So, I go in her room and she is in the back corner of her crib! She must have been rolling all over the place! She drinks her 6 oz, gives me plenty of sleepy smiles which I am sure means "Mommy I love you!! Thanks for feeding me!" and then goes back to sleep until 6:15 when I got her up for the day!

So by the time she went down and I got up for the day... I was only up twice.... thats progress! And her not having a bottle at all is awesome! .... This means her little belly can handle not eating at night and she CAN sleep thru the night! My friend's doctor told her that once her daughter slept thru the night, if the following ngihts she woke up, dont feed her, bc she has already proved that she can make it all night without a bottle and you dont want to start the habit of waking up for one again. You just need to give them a binkie and rock them back to sleep.

Brian will be home tonight.... yeah for an extra hand!! ... and I guess we will try to go for no bottle again! Dont worry I wont starve her though... if she is just refusing to go back to sleep and really acting like she needs that bottle... I wont keep it from her.

Lets hope 3rd times the charm!!


This is my baby girl before waking her up this morning.... last night wasn't too bad.... ill write about it later today when I have time.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Night #1

I am sure you are all anxious to hear how last night went....

Well it wasnt half bad....

Leah was not swaddled once!! I did as I said I would and I put it away! ... well in the laundry to get cleaned before getting put away.... but thats besides the point.

The night went a little like this:

7:00 - bottle, rocked for a few minutes, and put down.

8:00 - woke up SCREAMING again.... I have decided that I really think this new cry is actually her "hey! I want attention cry!" so I need to be strong and not give into it so easily! ... anyways, I got her up, rocked for a few minutes, and she went right back down.

11:30 - Up again... this time I saw the clock correctly when I got out ot bed, so no bottle...she has also started this "im tired" moan... where she just moans and whimpers with her binkie in and eyes closed...its kind of cute... anyways I rocked her for a few minutes and then just put her back in her crib. She kept up the moaning, but rolled on to her side so I could rub her back for a little bit before leaving her. I have to admit she is SOOOOOO cute when she is curled up on her side sleeping... I could sit and watch her all night!

2:15 - Up for her bottle... she drank nearly all of it and went right back down. So nice!

4:45 - Up again... just needed some more rocking and back rubbing and she was back down.

6:00 - I got up and in the shower (1/2 hour later than I wanted) and when I got out she was up and crying... but not her "I want attention" cry....

So it wanst horrible... It was alot like the night before...I was never up for more than 15 minutes at a time. I know I need to work on her "crying it out" but we can only do one step at a time... right now its working on the no more swaddling in hopes that it helps with her naps! ... maybe next week we can conquer that next hurdle.

In other news, Leah had a check up this morning on her ears... they looked all clear and she has a clean bill of health! HOORAY! This is about the healthiest she has been since the beginning of Feb!! I can kind of tell too... she is just a much happier baby lately too!! :) Now lets hope she can stay healthy until the fall when the next round of colds and new germy little kids arrive!!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Do I have a newborn again?

Leah's sleeping habits are getting worse! ... and I am getting completely frustrated!

This is how last night went:

7:00 - had a bottle, was fighting off sleep, put her down in her crib at 7:30. I thought she would
be OUT... she had only 1 nap, (almost 2 hrs long) all day.

8:00 - woke up SCREAMING! I thought I would try the "let her cry it out and see if she settles herself back down to sleep"... I let her cry for about 5 minutes, but then I couldnt take it any longer. I had never heard her cry so hard before! When I finally went in, I saw just how hard she was crying... she had tears streaming down her face and she was almost hyperventilating as she was trying to calm down. I felt HORRIBLE! ... and to make it worse, I have no idea why she was so upset! It seemed like it was seriously just for her binkie! After about 5 minutes, she was back to sleep.

9:00 - she woke up screaming again! This time I went straight in and gave her her binkie, didnt even pick her up and she was back out....

11:35 - woke up again!.. but this time in my sleep deprivation, I thought she clock said 1:35, so I fed her.... Usually I try to only feed her once a night... so she doesnt get used to eating thru-out the night... usually she only gets up once between 1-3 am for that bottle... She quickly drank her 4 oz and then was back to sleep. When I got back to bed and saw the real time, I knew it was going to continue to be a rough night!

3:15 - Up again for her usual bottle.... drank it all quickly and was back down...

5:25 - Up fussing.... I believe Cora the cat was in her crib and had woken her up!!! GRRRR! When Cora does this she is lucky that she is quick and little and can hide bc Im usually so ticked off that she would not want to come near me! ... My alarm clock was about to go off, so I did not want Leah up we rocked for a few minutes until she was back to sleep so that I could get dressed for the day....

6:15 - I got her up, fed 6 oz, and dressed for the day so that we could hurry out the door by 6:45. (I miss Brian being home and taking her at 7:05!)

It stinks bc I cant exactly pin point her problem either! Its even more frustrating that she once a upon a time did sleep thru the night!! Why can we not get that back!?!!?!

I admit... after trying to break her of it... I am still swaddling her... but she is like Huddini and every time I go in to check on her, her arms are out...

I think we might be throwing out the swaddler... seriously this time. I heard it takes 3 days to break them and start a new sleep habit... she is already getting up MULITPLE times a night, and I can barely sleep anyways with Brian out of town... why not attempt this ... again? I can usually get her down initially unswaddled, but sometime thru out the night I end up putting her back in it... this time No. I am going to pack it away in the closet and just do it! Promise.... I hope!

So what if I am sleep deprived this week.... I have a new addiction to Mocha Frappicinos (with an extra shot of espresso) and I can freely feed that addiction this week then.

So lets all hope for better nights! Think happy thoughts and send them our way! She is almost 5 months old and over 16 lbs! She should be able to do this right!?!

Note to my brother - You love to research and learn new things... feel free to research this for me! It will help you eventually too!! - Love your sis!

Like father, like daughter....

I think Leah might be more like her dad then we think!!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Growing up

My baby girl is getting so big!!!! Look at her in her new disney princess chair my friend ashley gave her!!!  She loves it!

This morning brian had put an empty bottle for daycare in her car seat with her, brian said he looked back and she was trying to get it in her mouth to drink it....

She is just growing up so fast!!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Financial Mathematics = Hard!

My test is 5 weeks away....
Part of me is terrified.... completely scared of failing AGAIN! ....
Part of me is feeling OK.... and even slightly confident.
Its definitely HARD trying to study with a baby... work has been busy, so I dont have my usual hours of study time at work, and I am usually so tired by the time Leah goes to bed that I am ready for bed too.... and remember Leah's napping strike? I could maybe get a problem or two done during her mini naps....
I dont have the number of study hours that I would like.... but having taken the test already and already being familiar with the material I feel a little better. I cant imagine trying to learn new material while trying to learn how to be a working mom at the same time! Im glad I took the exam in Nov... even if I was 38 weeks pregnant and thinking about what I had to get at Babies R Us the whole time....
Things are clicking.... topics that I previously has skipped over and thought "Oh there will probably just be 1 question on this... screw it... I can ace everything else." I am completely understanding, which is awesome bc there were more like 50% of the question on these topics rather just 1 or 2!
But there are SOOO many things to remember... SOOO many formulas..... SOOO many rules! I already have mama brain and have a hard time remembering to bring my lunch to work with me!
I found out that the pass rate for the exam that I took in Nov was only 39%.... that was the lowest pass rate of all the actuary exams given in the fall by almost 10%!
Now do I take this information as "its ok that I didnt pass.... neither did 61% of the people that took it" .... or do I take it as "EEKS! Why on earth am I trying again!?"
Brian is going to start taking Leah out of the house on Sundays for me to get a few hours of quiet, uninterrupted study time..... lets hope I can pick things up and PASS!!!!!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Happy Easter!.. a day late...

Yesterday morning Leah and I had a talk.... I told her how the Easter Bunny didnt come, because he doesnt come for babies... but maybe next year....

Then last night... after going to my parents for lunch and playing some tennis... we were at home with the front door open. We have a glass storm door (I guess that is what you would call it) where the cats love to sit and look outside, dreaming of being outdoor cats. All of a sudden we heard something hit the door.. we figured it was the cats, but when we checked, they were not there.... instead there was an itty bitty bunny rabbit sitting on our door step!

The Easter Bunny did come to see Leah!

Friday, April 2, 2010

oh the future

Brian and I had a finance talk.....

Brian is great about mentioning a timeline of our financial goals whenever we have these talks....

Here is just a highlight of our conversation....

Brian: "I think we can move to Fenton in 2014. That is one year before Leah starts kindergarten. "
Kim: nods...
Brian: "When do you want to move?"
Kim: "Now!!"
Brian: "Do you really want to move now, into a 250,000 dollar house?" (This in Fenton is about equal to what we have now...)
Kim: ... "we will be rich later"....
Brian: "Yeah but Leah will have to move into the basement at age 6! "

Conversation #2...

Brian: "I think we should get you a van next year"....
Kim: a look of saddness.....

I understand that it will be logical for me to get a van as my next car.... this car will be used for 8-10 years hopefully and by then we hope to have 3 kids so obviously we will need more than the usual and we dont think we can afford a big SUV that fits that many... BUT.... I will be 26! ... WITH A MINI VAN! Does anyone else see why I had the sad face?

I know I am a grown up... a mom.... a wife.... but I am still young! ..... for some reason, that mini van at 26 just signals "good bye youth..... hello midlife!"


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