I wish I could be writing only about our trip to the hospital yesterday morning for Leah's big sibiling class, but the event was quickly over shadowed by our second trip to the hospital yesterday.
The day was going great... Hospital class & tour, watched 1.5 innings of the local baseball team and Brian's Alma Mater's game, a nice nap on the couch, and then up to play outside in the sprinkler in the heat.
We had been outside for probably 45 minutes. Leah, Mommy & even Daddy played in the sprinkler and blew bubbles. Things are going great and Brian was about to start BBQing dinner. We took a small drink break where Leah was drinking a Gatorade.
All of a sudden Leah just dropped her bottle. Brian and I kind of scowled at her. Leah did not respond at all and just kept starring off into space. We said her name a few more times, tried to get her attention, Brian waving his arms in front of her... and then she looked like she was about to fall over.
I grabbed her, looked her in her eye... and saw her pupils almost disappear... I knew something was wrong.
I looked at Brian and told him to go call 9-1-1.
He went inside while I was left to deal with things getting even scarier.
I picked her up but her lack of response worried me so I laid her in the grass. She was starting to turn blue and not breathing. I smacked her chest a few times. Tried to my best at CPR where all I thought was "I have no idea what I am doing! I dont know CPR! I am going to watch my daughter die!" It was probably one of the most terrifying moments of my life. Just thinking about her laying there, with nothing in her eyes, her face a purplish blue, is something I am sure I will never forget and will haunt me forever. I wish I could block it from memory.
A house that we sort of back up to happen to be having a Cinco de Mayo party and were hanging out on their fancy new back patio. Knowing that I did not know how to help my daughter I picked Leah up and headed towards their house where I yelled for help.
Things are a little blurry. I know I laid Leah back down on the ground... 2 guys rushed over... and something happened that Leah all of a sudden coughed. Her eyes had life in them again. She acted like she had just woken up. Stretching, looking around, a bit unsure.
By then more people had come over. Someone had touched Leah, realized how hot she was, and told me to take her inside to cool down while we waited for the ambulance. Once back in the basement some women tried to comfort us, one of them on the phone with her EMT husband who was on his way over. Next came in 2 police officers, firemen and EMTs.
At initial checking, Leah was a bit lethargic. She had not said anything but would answer the EMT's questions with her eyes. Answering where her mommy and daddy were. Her heart rate was 160, faster than her unborn baby sisters.
They had not taken her temperature yet, but gave her ice packs to just try and cool her down. By the time we were on the way to the hospital and it was finally taken, it came in at 105.7.
Leah was still pretty out of it. She did not even flinch when they put in her IV.
She eventually started to wake up and come around. By the time we were nearing the hospital, which is only about 12 miles away she was crying for me. When it was time to get out she responded with "we at grandma and papa's house?"
As the IV did its magic and medicine was given, her fever quickly fell and our Leah began to return. She even became a crazy, bossy, super talkative, sassy, pretending to be a doctor, little girl. I joked that her IV was filled with caffeine or something because she had done such a 180 and was just in such a great mood.
While we waited for the results of her blood test, x-ray, and examination from the doctor, I couldn't help but to question myself as a mother. Did I do something wrong to make this happen? Did she not eat or drink enough all day? Did I overlook her runny nose and cough? Is there something horribly wrong that will appear in her blood test? My mind questioned everything and wondered to the worst of places.
Blood work returned perfect. X-ray showed nothing. But an ear looked infected.
We believe Leah had a febrile seizure as the result of her spiked fever.
I know they are very common in little kids. And even the best sort of seizure to have when it comes to seizures.
I am extremely grateful that Leah only has an ear infection as well.
But it does not make it any less terrifying and traumatizing.
I hope it was the worst day of my life because I do not know how I would handle anything worst happening to Leah or my future children.
According to my mother, who experienced similar events with my brother when he was younger, this is why parenthood gives you grey hairs.